Be a Hero

gary, davis, hero, purple, heart, Looking over a dog-eared, parchment-like copy of When Dreams & Heroes Die: a portrait of today’s college student, (by Arthur Levine, 1980), I was taken back to a quite different time in our history. It wasn’t so much the time difference, or the cultural/time-distance warp, as it was the way Levine analyzed the characteristics of that period’s college culture. Boomers, busters, Gen-X, Gen-Y, yada, yada, yada. ALL of us have experienced the sadness of childhood disappointment of “heroes” who have disappointed us, let us down, deceived us, or who lost our trust through betrayed belief.

Heroes become real human beings with real failures, real flaws; some dissolve into the fantasies of their foundation, real illusions with no connection to real life; comic book/computer game avatars which have no association with the reality of actual beings. Yet, to be sure, there are real heroes: and most of us hold onto dreams that we truly want to become realities. Dreams are good, in fact, great! NOT to dream is to resign oneself to the humdrum of a dreary life, to personal anonymity and an interior death. It is to become a non-person, a mere cog-in-the-wheel, grinding out a life’s work as an automaton.

It is a reality of life—heroes do die, let us down, disappoint us: dreams also die; we settle for 2nd best, 3rd best, etc. Some of us give up our dreams altogether. And we have lost all (or most) of our heroes to time, fantasy, or failure. We have arrived at the blank wall of the convoluted definition, without role-models to provide us with points-of-reference or moral character.

Allow me to offer an alternative scenario. Could our loss of dreams and heroes actually be a trigger for us to rise to the occasion? Is it time for you to become the hero? To become the role-model for those who already look to you as someone they would seek to emulate? Is it time for you to help people dream their dreams? Fulfill their dreams?

Instead of hanging onto your fantasy-heroes of the past, your dreams for significance, maybe it’s time you became the hero for so many others, or even one other. Actually, maybe you already are significant; not in your eyes, but in the eyes of this generation’s emerging leaders.

So review what you’ve accomplished in your life. Is it enough? What more is there that you must do to make a difference for God and for humanity? BUT…, but— Who will be your protégée; what legacy will you leave in the people in whom you’ve invested? What’s your plan? Don’t have one? Why not? WHO are the people God has given to you to nurture to greatness? HOW do you care for them, train them, feed their souls?

BE the hero: make the dreams work! So help you God if you shy away from this great responsibility, this great honor.

Have a nice week.

Gary

Hidden

051048048057054055054050124053048048124052048048Why are we hiding? Or— What is it we try to hide? Too many of us exert a lot of energy trying to hide, or trying to hide something about ourselves that, if revealed, would expose us.

The artistry of Bev Doolitle (1947-   ) depicts objects hidden to the casual observer. We are so much like the horses in her paintings. If people were to look intently at our life, what is it we would try to hide? I’ve worked with some people whose biggest fear in getting married was being known. I tried to assure them that being known, and still loved, was the best part of being married; I’m not sure they bought it.

What drives us to hide things? Insecurity, fear, shame, dishonesty? Or worse, why do we hide ourselves? Of course, if you’ve been betrayed or used, there is some warrant for it. You don’t want to be hurt that deeply again.

The issue, basically, is one of safety. We ALL want to feel safe. So we hide the parts of us that would expose us. This is wise…, to a point. But our need for safety can also choke the spirit within us. It can bind us in a box with just slits through which we take in the outside world.

Would you like to escape your box and take in more of the outside world? Here are some ideas—

  • Spend time with people. Reflecting off of them will give you insights into yourself. You’ll surprise them; they’ll surprise you.
  • Try something that engages your soul. Doesn’t matter what. Just not too much over the line. Deeper discussion, life challenging experiences. Hold back on sky-diving.
  • Build one-safe-friendship. Create a confident.
  • Create a private novel about the kind of life you’d like to live. Then, slowly, start to live it.

Hiding takes a lot of energy. Think what you might be accomplishing if you didn’t have to work so hard at hiding your true self. Think of the energy you could invest in developing new dreams, new skills or new relationships. Be intentional. Remaining hidden, if pursued over a long period of time, results in further isolation; and that creates further fear of being known.

You do not need to stay hidden. Make the decision to be known.

For what it’s worth,

Gary

Etiquette for Enlightened Evangelism

Gary, davis, Christian, manners, care, pray, Many people would agree that manners matter. In the case of how we interact with people outside our Christian culture it is just as important. Here are 10 rules to help you in your etiquette within society.

1. PRAY– Ask God to prepare you to offer Him to people you don’t know.

2. Do your homework-Learn about yourself, your culture and the gospel.

1 Peter 3:15 “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience…”

3. Go where people go– Jesus didn’t sit around and wait for people; follow His example.

4. Shut your face-Much of the work we need to do has already been done by the Holy Spirit. Ask questions to see what is important to them. Find out what the Lord has revealed to them already.

5. Be interactive in conversations-Let feedback determine the way your express God’s love to another. (This requires you to listen)

6. Become transparent– Relax, you don’t have to be perfect, but you MUST be open and honest. Let others see that Christianity can be messy, because it is REAL!

7. Develop the art of caring-People are not a sting operation: they are not projects or targets. We must learn how to love them in the process of life. Meaning caring take time.

8-Make time for people– Now take some time with them. The gospel is best communicated with action more than words.

9- Find out how people it in life without God– This is critical! If a person feels no need for God because he can make it on his own, then how will they ever respond with a NEED for the kingdom? Another reason to take your time and learn more about a person.

10-Pray with people– Ask first, then watch how God becomes visible in their lives.

 

Resilience

????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????Resilience

Bouncing back. Getting up again. Beaten down and rising from
the ashes like the Phoenix. Overcoming failure and discouragement. Going for it again.

Why are some of us good

at it and others not so much?

Resilience is not necessarily based on generation, gender, cultural affinity, location or situation. It seems to be ingrained in certain people; they just have what it takes.

For others, who have been beaten down repeatedly, it becomes a matter of fortitude and determination. Sheer will-power. They have to fight not only their surrounding circumstances, but themselves as well. That is no simple matter. So what does it take to become resilient?

First, it requires that you make a decision; maybe two. 1) That you will not let this thing, whatever it is, overwhelm you. You will not let it win. And, 2) that you will fight, FIGHT, to overcome it. If these decisions are not made right up front, you do not stand a chance.

Second, you will need to surround yourself with friends of equal mind, kindred spirits, who share your dreams and goals in life. Do NOT hold back from seeking their advice, solace, and wisdom.

Third, you will want to set timely goals or check-points along the way for evaluating your recovery. How well am I bouncing back? Have trusted friends also give you feedback on how you’re doing. Be assured that setbacks will assail you; that’s life. But you are not back at Square-One. It’s just a setback.

Finally, and I hesitate to suggest this because so many of us use this as a scapegoat for being responsible- try PRAYING. (not for relief but for strength and wisdom) There’s something that cleanses the heart, mind, & soul through prayer. So, Christian or otherwise, try talking to the ceiling: you may just be pushing beyond it.

Resilience is every bit as much a matter of faith as it is fortitude. It is a determination within your soul that has its expression in the lives we live. Don’t hold back.

You can teach yourself to bounce back. Keep practicing. One day it will come more naturally.

Now, where’s my Pogo Stick,

  Gary

The (real)First Step

The first step in bringing people to faith in Christ is to get to know them. BUT before that, we need to understand how they see is. One of the ways I find out what people think about us it to ask them.

Here’s a video of just such conversations.

So when you leave your computer/phone, immerse yourself in the lives of your friends and workmates. Start by ASKING questions like:

1.What do you enjoy most about your life?

2. What is the most fun thing you’ve ever done?

3. What was it like growing up?

4. What has been your experience with Christianity, good and bad?

5. Describe your religious beliefs now. What does your spirituality offer you that Christianity does not?

6. To what extent do your beliefs influence your decisions and life motivations?

7.What problems do you have with the Church and/or Christianity?

8. How do you feel when a Christian tries to convert you?

9.How would you like Christians to treat you?

10. If you could change anything about the church, christians or Christianity what would you change?

11. How do you know that you are loved by someone?

Then after you have won the right to be heard, (maybe months or even years later) tell them about the God who created them, who loves them and who wants to give them everything He has to offer. Tell them about the God who offers his forgiveness to them for all the times they dishonored him. Tell them about the God who wants to make them WHOLE persons again.

 

 

 

Wrong Assumptions

Assumptions not to make in our culture

Gordon Tarpley

Don’t to assume that the gospel is just Words.

 

Don’t assume that the gospel explained logically will get a response.

 

Don’t assume that people have the same understanding and experiences of God that we do.

 

Don’t assume that people understand what sin is, or even that it is bad.

 

Don’t assume that people Feel a Need for God in their lives.

 

Don’t assume that all people are seekers.

The perfect song for the new year

Thank you King and Country. I couldn’t have said it better.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NM-Bf9gE0gw

New Year’s Restorations

462px-happy_2016_fizzWhat happens when you make New Year’s Resolutions? Do you remember what they were by the end of January? Do you even remember them by the end of the day January 1st? Right; me either.

So to increase our chances of success in the New Year let’s change the rules. Instead of making Resolutions we will more than likely forget, let’s establish a set of New Year’s Restorations; things and relationships in our lives that need to be rebuilt if we are to move through live more smoothly.

  1. What family members need your silent forgiveness, followed with appropriate expressions of love?
  2. The same goes for business relationships; that is, if you want your business to thrive next year.
  3. What parts of your own soul are in need of some repair and restoration?
  4. Same Four Questions I always raise—
    1. What one thing needs to change?
    2. What new thing [or things] needs to be added?
    3. What present thing(s) needs to go, to be eliminated from your life?
    4. What needs to be kept, but seriously modified to fit the next you?
  5. How did you make a difference last year? Keep doing that. You created something
  6. What were your greatest blunders? Just don’t repeat them again or you will need even more restoration.
  7. What kind of people do you need more of in your life?
  8. What kind of people have been a bad influence on you and need to go?
  9. Do you have a spiritual dimension to your life? If not, why not? God is no human projection.
  10. Ask, “The One Think I must accomplish in 2016, no matter what, is…?”

It is always good to check-in with yourself on a regular basis. I do it monthly, quarterly, & yearly. When was the last time you put your life through a tune-up?

Restoration is good for every aspect of your life. Get to it.

May this New Year restore your soul…, and so much more,

Gary

 

Christmas Future Past

chrstmas future pastChristmastime changes as we grow up. My childhood Christmas’ were filled with model cars, trains, wooden airplanes, & cookies! My mom could make the bestest Christmas cookies ever!

As I approached my teens took on the shapes of bikes, guests around the dinner table, and spending Christmas day with friends of my parents, or relatives who were terrified of children. They were the days when I felt like an afterthought.

My College days remedied that as I would spend much of Christmas at home, but not with my parents. Rather, with my own friends. As I look back, this was quite selfish and insensitive of me.

Marrying Starr was probably the best gift God ever gave me. We built a home together and then celebrated Christmas after Christmas in lavish insanity! They were wonderful days of cutting down our own tree (which we still do), hiding presents at neighbor’s homes, and, of course, baking more cookies. I would never have imagined that my wife could outbake my mother; but she did.

Now, our children are growing their own Christmas traditions with families of their own. They “visit” us at Christmas. It feels weird. We who shared so much together as a family are divided between Christmas Past, and Christmas Future. Letting go is hard to do. Starr and I miss our traditions and our times together. But all of us go through this, don’t we.

So now we are turning the page to a new saga of Christmases in our lives. New times shared, multiple Christmases, blending and separating new & old traditions, celebrating together sometimes; mostly, with all our children somewhere else on the map. Back to just us again…, but different.

So as you celebrate this Christmas season, enjoy the memories of the past. But keep your pen on the paper to write new customs to celebrate Christmas in the future. God gave us this time of year so we could shift gears from the everyday routine of living, to be with family, families, friends, past & future, and to thank God for giving us a baby who would change the world forever.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

  Gary