How does love affect us?

gary, davis, love, live, heart, affect, christian, clueless

Your first thought should be, “You’re kidding right!?!” Everyone knows how love affects us. Do we? From The World of Psychology comes these ideas on How Being in Love Affects Your Personality. https://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/05/30/the-science-of-love-9-ways-being-in-love-affects-your-personality/ .

  1. You’re a Combination of Happy and Anxious.
  2. You’re Addicted.
  3. You’re Capable of Taking More RISKS.
  4. You’re Over-the-Top Overprotective.
  5. You Can’t Focus.
  6. You’re Confident
  7. If You’re Neurotic, You Become Stabilized.
  8. You Don’t Judge.
  9. You’re Smarter.

In short, your dopamine level propels you to heights you never thought you could achieve. But it’s not simply chemical. That’s merely a scientific analysis.

Being LOVED is an enabler, a foundation, a definer, a source of personal strength, a reference point, and a reflective mirrorof who you are. When you know you are loved you feel safe, secure, and in a place where things make sense. This is true of romantic love, family love, brotherly love, or familiar love. Love provides the context for so much of our life that it can never be underestimated.

NOT being loved creates a vacuum in us which is not always filled by wonderful things! Just the opposite; we replace a healthy human love with a self-promoting, self-aggrandizing love. This kind of love may seem fulfilling at the moment, but in the longer view creates isolation, protective walls, and a façade we want others to see. Choose your loves wisely.

There is yet another effect of love on us. It stems from the love that we give to others. Because if love is to be grasped to the fullest, it not only must be received, but given. Dare I say that if you have difficulty receiving love, you will have equal difficultyexpressing love. Love’s manifold facets affect us in the giving and receiving of it; its volume expands exponentially as it is given. For that is what grounds love in its fuller context.

So, if I may ask, How’s your love life? Are you being loved in such a way that it fills your life? Are you loving another that enhances your own life (& theirs, of course)? Or do you find it hard to love or be loved? These are the kinds of questions to talk over with your spouse, a good friend, or a counselor.

 NEXT DISCUSSION:  What are the effects of NOT being loved? Of NOT loving?

 How do you say “I love you?

Gary

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Why my heart aches

There have been too many times in life where my heart has been crushed by the suffering of others. Their experiences and anguish were hard to hear. I can’t imagine how they lived through those times. Some had gathered the fortitude and faith to persevere; others, not so much.

What the human spirit, heart, and body can endure always amazes me. I remember a woman, a teacher, once came to me with grey hair. The day before her hair had been auburn. The beating she had endured the previous night had been so terrifying that it turned her hair grey in a matter of minutes. Her husband is now in jail. How did she endure such terror?

Another person I know has almost lost her mind and any will to live because of a brutal rape. Another woman came to me after her 6th abortion. Sixth! She wasn’t sure who she was anymore; she wasn’t sure she could ever have children.

Other friends have lived through “less” traumatic experiences— the suicide of a husband, the loss of a job, living on the grace of others after months of unemployment, the loss of their child. My heart aches for these people.

Over the years, I have been able to move from sympathetic to empathetic, allowing me some distance to garner wisdom and perspective on their horror. It is hard to help another when we are in the thick of it with them. When there, we can offer comfort; but little else. We have not the strength.

On a grander scale, my heart aches for this world— the natural catastrophes, the fires, floods, and earthquakes; but also the human devastations— genocides, regional wars, terrorists attacks, the manipulation of the balance of trade, the prices of oil and grains, and forced poverty and human sex trafficking. The injustices I read online every hour. All of this weighs on me heavily.

How should I, should we, respond to this mess?

My first thought is to become a part of the solution. To make a difference! To be one-of-many who count the cost and throw themselves into the fracas. Who, instead of protecting our own interests, look to the needs and well-being of those truly in need.

Sure, my heart still aches. But at least I am doing something. How about you?

‘Nough said,

Gary

fireheart

The flame ignited, burning hot, passions flaring, intensity glowing, depth and elation stretching the limits of reason, mind and body. Your heart is racing, blood pumping. You are ready. You are on fire! Inextinguishable energy personified.

But there is another side. Burned. Emotionally, physically, to the core of your being. Trust destroyed. Energies extinguished. Your heart a pyramid of embers, not even smoldering. Or, ruthlessly smoldering with rage.

The heart holds such sway over human nature. Kingdoms have been built, flourished, defended, and lost because of visions dreamed and passion abated. Great art and great destruction have flowed from its river. The heart is a burning flame with the capacity to inspire or enrage. If crushed, its restoration is costly, both in time and effort. For a wounded heart is reluctant to let even its possessor near.

So what is it that ignites this simple organ, this muscle that calibrates and controls the flow of our life blood throughout our body? What is it that transmutes it from a simple body part into our source of passion and power? What enflames it to become a fireheart ?

1. A Challenge. Whether a problem to solve or a situation to resolve, or a task to be accomplished, it is only a burning desire within that is formidable enough to achieve a triumphant outcome.

2. Anger. Some things should get us so mad that we do something about it; not in retaliation, but in sensible reactions that resolve issues.

3. Intense Fear. The fear that cripples so severely may also serve as the catalyst that launches our hearts to fight. Use fear: do not give into it. [Note. Soldiers at war, in face of imminent death, have moved from mere men to heroes when they faced this fear.]

4. Faith. Believing that something is right and worth living for is an inspiring launching pad for great accomplishments. IF you truly believe in it. And act! [Note. Many genuine Christians have given their lives for what they believed; fewer agnostics or atheists have done the same.]

One final point to ponder— Is your heart a fireheart? What are you doing about it?

Have a nice week,
Gary