Thoughts On Moving Beyond

It is a common human experience that we all need to move beyond certain phases in our life and onto another, new, situation. As we do this, the next phase may not be quite as clear as we would like. There are blank areas, there is ambiguity, confusion and, genuine fear about how to move ahead.

We call this being human.

Some of us are better at taking risks and moving beyond our present circumstances: others of us, not so much. But this isn’t something born into our DNA. Learning to take risks of faith and moving out can be done safely. Somewhat.

One thing is certain, if you play it safe and stay where you are stagnation and frustration will eventually creep in. Actually, I’m going through a transition like this in my life right now. The future is not as clear as I would like it.

But I have to forge ahead! Wherever “ahead” is.

Here are some thoughts on facing our futures—

1. You and I need to let go of our pasts; whether successful or painful, LET THEM GO!

2. Some friendships will stay with you. Many will simply fade to a memory. And that’s OK. It may be sad, but trust in the God who made you to drop new meaningful relationships into your life.

(He kind of does that, doesn’t He. I can live with that. Can you?)

3. Don’t think all your ducks have to be in line before you press forward. They do not.

4. You may find some “life-pauses” interrupting your forward motion. That’s OK too. Seriously, where’s the rush?

5. Get some help with thinking outside the box. Other people can spot your strengths/weaknesses before you can.

6. Remember God does have your best interests at heart. He is not sitting up there in heaven thinking of ways of screwing you over.

7. Transitions to a new phase in life make take time. Our Scripture reminds us, “They that WAIT upon the Lord will renew their strength.

Are you really trying to define your future before it’s time? Bad move. Take things as they come; don’t force the change. God is still in control so you don’t have to be.

Take Courage and move ahead,

Gary

NEXT— EMPulse 26- Marking time

New Eyes of Faith

Ever notice how your eyes have to adjust when you move from a light room to a darker one? It takes the eyes longer to make out shapes, figures, and people.

Going through a transition in life into a new phase is similar. You can’t quite make out the new images and shapes of faith you need to adapt to. You truly must become a new person.

For most of us, God calls us to new shapes of faith throughout our lives. Sometime, those new shapes are simply a rolling over from our last shape of faith. Other times…, not so much. Deeper faith is always a challenge.

And, there is no going back to the way you were. NO WAY. Your only way out if forward. It’s like going from the light into the dark. You need time to adjust to who you will become now.

Retirement is definitely a move from light to dark, where the future is not so clear. Things will take time to become clearer.

So, whatever you are going through now will have to face new images of you, new ways of seeing things. The shape of your faith will have to adjust to this new reality.

Some of the things we will have to change are—

1. How we use our time.

2. Deciding what our new priorities should be.

3. Changing friendships, meeting new people.

4. Adjusting to a lower income.

5. Becoming more just-the-two-of-us.

6. What it means to be Christian in this new Quantum Era.

As I’ve aged things I did not understand in my 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s are now making more sense. You will find that in your life as well.

Progressive perspective.

If we do not adapt to these new realities we will become stuck in our old ways. There may have been safety there— But we cannot stay there.

Adapt. Adjust. Become something other than who/what you were. Jesus had to when he came to earth.

Find hope my friend, in the God Who knows you,

Gary

NEXT– thoughts on moving beyond.

Phases and Transitions 2024

We’ve all gone through numerous phases and transitions in life. Graduating high school, workforce, college, grad school, first professional job, marriage, kids, divorce, world travel surprises. Then there our successes, disappointments, failures, grand triumphs, learning new things. They all play a part in shaping who we are, who we become, throughout our lives.

One of the most difficult transitions I’ve ever had to face is the one between purpose and retirement. I’ve moved from having great influence in peoples’ lives, with the commensurate travel, to one of silent bewilderment.

Who am I now? What was I before? What are my definers in this new phase of life? What is, or should, be important to me now?

Ever been there? This is my first time retiring. And it’s not an easy place to be.

I used to be good at this stuff— defining the attributes of a phase, understanding the lack of definers when we’re in a transition, etc. And it really is true that we cannot go back to the previous phase. That part of our life is gone. We must move forward.

But what if you don’t know what forward looks like? Hummm. Impasse? Tough one.

Is that the time when we should gather a cadre of friends around us, who know us well, and get their input, their take on the conundrum? I think probably yes.

Still, especially in these days, I fall back on Psalm 42 for its wisdom and admonition.

Why art thou cast down, o my soul?

And why art thou disquieted within me?

Hope thou in God,

For I shall yet praise him,

Who is the health of my countenence,

And my God.

Our God can sustain me and my confusion through these transitional times without answers, and lead me out the other side.

Find hope my friend, in the God Who knows you,

Gary

…staying the course

There has been a lot written about staying the course. Very Definitely in the military; even more in the projections in the business & financial communities. Even within the Christian community we are called to stay the course, to persevere, to overcome trials, persecutions, and rejections.

But this is easier said than done. I know Christians in this world who go through unspeakable persecution, loss of hope, and depths of despair; some even loss of family and life.

So what about you, or me? Have we experienced persecution? Have we felt the pain of rejection from our community, our family…, our church? There is so much rejection and separation in our world, and in our Christian communities, that there are few of us who have not experienced some form of isolation from those who surround us.

Keep in mind the admonition of the apostle Paul to his young mentee, Timothy— Suffer hardship with us, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus. [2 Timothy 2:3] How will we suffer hardship? Where will it come from?

FROM ANYWHERE! EVERYWHERE!

Still, we are admonished throughout Scripture, through the Old Testament and the New, that we are different than the world in which we live. I like the t-shirt from THE CHOSEN docuseries—

Get used to different.

Many disciples before us have suffered persecutions unimaginable just because they are different. Christians in the West have known little of what those before us, and around this world today, have been subjected to.

To stay the course, in our era we would do well to heed the words of Paul—

Therefore I endure

for the sake of the elect,

that they too may obtain the salvation

that is in Christ Jesus with eternal glory.

Here is a trustworthy saying:

If we died with Him,

we will also live with Him.

So, how are you doing? Staying the course? Or, are you too easily going off the mark?

Gary

NEXT–Course correction guide.

Afterthoughts – A Confession

The saying goes that Confession is good for the soul. Actually, it is good for a lot of things. Whether confessed to a priest, a pastor, or a good friend— admitting wrong, or sin, can start to free your spirit from the burden of guilt you carry for what you have done that did not clear with your own conscience, let alone before the throne of grace.

By admission, I’ve always wanted to have an impact on the American Evangelical world in the area of evangelism. I’ve come to believe that I have failed. It might be that the way I form my presentations is to obtuse or offensive. I do challenge our simplistic 4-point gospel outlines. Actually, the “canned” gospel approach may have been acceptable for a brief time in the early 1950s, but it has long since lost its effectiveness.

But back to the point. I have always wanted to make a difference, both in the church and in our world. As I look back over the last 60 years I am not sure I have made that much of an difference. That is my confession. If there is any impact it has been God’s work through my pitiful efforts to matter.

As I face my 79^th birthday next month (gifts appreciated) I am keenly aware that I do not have another 79 years in front of me. So, what’s next?

On December 31^st, I say goodbye to 40+ years of ministry through NEED^inc, I am trying to determine what God has designed me for next. Any ideas.

When I first started in ministry the Lord defined my calling as such—

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
    because the Lord has anointed me
    to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
    to proclaim freedom for the captives
    and release from darkness for the prisoners,^[^a^]

— Isaiah 61:1 (NIV)

Not much has changed from that initial definition. It has been not only a call to action, but a call on my heart as well. I have grown in passion and compassion for those who increasingly have little understanding of the Lords claim on their lives. This has saddened me greatly.

What has hurt me is the minimal efforts by the evangelical community to care for those around them. The church has become a kingdom unto itself, NOT into the world. May God forgive us all.

End of confession.

Gary

NEXT— what to do next!?! .

Afterthoughts – Faith Shapes

Ever since the ascension of Jesus Christ the forms and shapes of our faith have been affected by the surrounding culture, individuals within that culture, the extent of our knowledge of Scripture, how that knowledge was used to build theology, and even our geography. (Think John Knox in Edinburgh in the sixteenth century.) Our expressions of the faith have varied from culture to culture, continent to continent, and been refined by individual Christian leaders in each setting.

Even today there are so many expressions of faith it is almost impossible to keep track of them all. The diversity of Christian expressions and shapes is immeasurable. The greatest diversity would probably be the Western Church expressions and the Orthodox (Eastern) expressions. (there are also numerous expressions across the South Sea Islands and Africa.) Historically, these two Eurasian forms were even at war with one another for dominance. Then there are at least 127 Protestant denominations (Europe, North/South America, Iceland, and numerous African expressions), the Roman Catholic and Greek Orthodox expressions; and 64 Baptist denominations. I think.

The point is that the Christian faith comes in a myriad of expressions; and even they have evolved over 2000 years of Christian history.

Many Protestants follow the Book of Common Prayer for a structure for their faith. Catholics use the Lectio Divina. Those we used to classify as Pentecostals are now Charismatics. And the Charismatics have been absorbed as today’s common expression of Protestant Christianity.

So what’s next?

Before we judge various expressions of our faith we should be planted squarely in one where God has placed us. Withhold judgement on others. Give the Holy Spirit of God time to test our spirits.

That brings us to a question we all must ask. What shape of faith is our Lord calling you to follow? A lot of the answer may be tied to the personality He has given you. Trust that God has designed you to worship and express your faith in ways appropriate to the times, your personality, your geography, and Scripture.

We are not all the same. We define our faith in different ways given our experiences, our relationships, our personalities, and the age in which our Lord has placed us. But we are never to express our faith in a way that is incommunicable to others.

Gary

NEXT— The Shower— rekindling the fire

Afterthoughts – Wearing out

We try to plan for it. Schedule breaks so we are prepared for it. But it usually just sneaks up on us. After a vigorous workout, a mentally challenging confrontation, or raising kids, we get to a point where we are simply worn out. New York traffic or the New Jersey Turnpike will do the same thing. We have all come to a point where there is just nothing left.

We start to feel like well worn tires with very little life left in them. If any. Our life isn’t over yet, but it sure feels like it. Retreads are not the solution.

I’ve had many times in my life where I simply could not go on. Taking a nap helps, but not always. [I’ve always had a terrible time shutting down my mind.] Why? Because the issues I face are still there, gnawing away at my heart, at my strength.

In more recent days I’ve also deal with my old nemesis— depression. And my residual postcancer treatments also take a toll on me. Ah, the joys of aging! Ugh.

So what can any of us do about wearing out?

For one, keep active. I don’t mean start exercising when you retire at 65, but throughout life. The later you start, the harder it gets. Trust me.

Get outdoors more. Sunshine, hiking in rain, overnight in a tent. All great things to do. Or, at the least, a game of tennis or round of golf. Avoid Bingo! You, know— sitting on your… .

Grow new friendships. The old ones will stay there, or not. But new Friendships are like starting over. READ! I’ve developed quite a hunger for new ideas. My wife still loves her British murder mysteries, but, for me, ehhh, not so much. I’ll take a good cultural analysis any day.

Spend more time listening for God to confide in you. You’re never alone. Get used to it. Our God is always just a heartbeat away. Sometimes, when you least expect it, He will ask you if you have any time for Him.

Say yes.

The other thing I do to keep from wearing out is to change my routine. At this stage in my life I find that “regular” is not the best for me. I feel trapped. Oh, except for going to the gym. THAT is a must M-W-F!

Also, try new things. Ever been skydiving? Me either. But I sure wouldn’t mind. OK, too much? Try Israeli food or taking a course in geriatric personal defense. How about going for another college degree?

On the other side— just take a rest! However you rest…, do that.

There are so many ways to rest. Above all, stop striving! God may not be finished with you…, yet; but that doesn’t mean you have to do more.

Gary

NEXT — CLUTTER!!!

Afterthoughts – Who am supposed to be in this stage of life?

Throughout life we should all be asking the question— Who am I now? But we don’t. We casually continue to go to work, drink, play, have relationships, end relationships, and start new ones. As if simply by rote or ecstatic event.

We celebrate new birth, commemorate special occasions, mourn loss, cry, laugh, go flat. It’s just all a part of life on earth.

Unless we are cognizant of it, we may miss that our world is changing. Likewise, we need to keep track of ourselves— that we are changing as well.

So who are you? What are the components that go into you, being you? Now. Not what used to define you, but what defines you now?

Erik Erikson, an American/German Psychologist, has set forth this classification—

· Infancy	· Toddlerhood
· Preschool years	· Early School Years
· Adolescence	· Young Adulthood
· Middle Adulthood	· Late Adulthood

If (and I do mean if) you mature just a little more in each phase you will give up your earlier toys, develop new friendships, set goals, deepen relationships (& give up others), figure out who you are, change, grow a family, learn it’s not-all-about-you, and pass along what you have learned to the next generation. Admittedly, this is a very simplistic progression.

But not all of us are aware of these phases and transitions. We know that graduating school, at whatever level, is a milestone. So is marrying. So is that big promotion or salary increase. And having children changes EVERYTHING. Still, the changes that happen around us could blind us to the changes we need to face.

Busy lives.

It’s so easy to get lost in life. In our work. In ourselves.

So what are you doing to keep track of yourself? Here are some guidelines.

1. If you set goals in life, how are you doing at completing them?

2. Areas where you are weak— what are you doing to strengthen them?

3. Places where you shine. How can you keep on shining and be humble about it?

4. What kind of support team will you need next in your life?

5. Can you admit wrong? What do you do about it?

To move into the next (healthier) phase of your life, you will need a safe place for refreshment. What is it? Truly, God will provide one it you ask. Ask.

Gary

Next – Wearing Out

After Thoughts – Where do you feel safe?

For most of my adult life I have maintained that everyone needs a safe place, a safe activity, and a safe person as a basis for their lives. But there exceptions. Prison changes people; so does war.

When we were children it was much simpler. We had our parents, or at least one of them, grandma, or our “Teddy.” For the most part our world was a safe place to live, learn, and be loved.

As we grew into our teenage years it wasn’t quite the same. “Love” sometimes meant being hurt, disappointed, or betrayed. Decisions were more complicated. We didn’t have the experience to make them all that well. We made mistakes. We learned. Hopefully.

In later years we learned we shouldn’t trust all people as naïvely or innocently as when we were younger. If there were any proof for evil in this world this is it— the loss of innocence.

For Christians, this comes as a shock. Too often, those we looked up to, those we trusted, those we admired, turned out to be not quite as “safe” as we once thought. Betrayal in the Christian world seems far more venomous than in our secular relationships.

It should not be this way.

I know I’ve addressed this issue before but given the increasing violence in our culture it is time to take another look. So allow me to wrap back to our beginning.

· Where is your safe place?

· What is your safe activity?

· Who is your safe person?

For a long time, my safe places have been the Galbraith lakehouse and these Colorado mountains. Both have provided a real solace for my soul. My safe activities have been working on my Volvos, and now, getting high into these beautiful mountains. I love living here. Other than my wife, Starr, I am not sure I have a safe person at the moment. Well, no. For 20 years now it would have to be my assistant Melanie. As I’ve often commented, my biggest fear in life is when Starr & Mel get together to discuss “me.”

Jesus once said ²⁸“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” [Matthew 11:28-29, NASB]

Gary

NEXT— The Shower— Who am I supposed to be at this phase in my life?

After Thoughts — How do you decide what’s right & wrong?

You have to make a decision. But you can’t decide what would be a good decision and what would be a bad decision. What do you do?

First you weigh the pros & cons of each side. What’s good for you: what’s not. What’s good for other people— that delivers the greatest good. But what if they’re even? I’d eliminate some of the lesser consequential pros or cons for a start.

Then there are those decisions that don’t have a right or wrong. They involve the heart. You don’t want to make them. But they must be made somewhat soon. Here’s where your intuition factor comes into play. You don’t have enough data to make an adequately informed decision; yet it must be made.

So now we move into the areas of personal track-record, of intuitive intuition, the hunch, the second-guess. Some of us have more of this, some of us, less. Ask a trusted friend to help.

About 10-15 years ago many of the teens in our neighborhood were wearing rubber bracelets that read WWJD. What would Jesus do? Of course, our society quickly transmuted that to We want Jack Daniels. So what else is new? The point was that some people were consulting Jesus, maybe the Bible, to get some help making decisions.

However, there is advice to be found in Proverbs 16:1-3—

To man belong the plans of the heart,

But the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.

All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes,

But the Lord weighs the motives.

Commit your works to the Lord,

And your plans will be established.

This poem conveys an overarching context for making decisions. First establish yourself within the perimeters of wisdom of our God. Then make your decisions.

There is something to be said for founding your life and heart in following the precepts of our Lord that provides a framework for everything else. Not that all decisions will be easy, or have a context for consideration. But if your life is in alignment with our Creator’s precepts for living, then making a decision has walls of protection within which decisions will be undergirded with a history of other wise decisions.

Gary

NEXT— The Shower—Where do you feel safe?

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