Let it go

Frozen, Dr, Gary, Davis, Clueless, Christian, Let it go, Let it go!

We all have things in our past that we need to let go. The movie Frozen  reminded us of this in the most beautiful way. Thank you Elsa. Although I did wonder if you didn’t go too far at times; like the proverbial throwing the baby out with the bath. Your letting-go was definitely a reflection of your rebellion— against your power, against obedience, and against everything you had been trained to be.

But it didn’t have to be that way. When people listen to their inner-rage, without the counsel of someone wise, they tend to let go of too much. We push people away so we can feel strong, safe, dominant over everything around us, but we are detached from it. Insulated from external influence, we become islands of isolation, convinced we can make it on our own, with no need for anyone else. This happens when some girl breaks up with you, or your marriage of 25 years comes crashing down around you; or that job you were committed to lets you go as part of a “downsizing.”

Some questions we all need to answer are—

1.      What kinds of things need to be let go?

2.      What are healthy ways to let go?

3.      What dare not be let go?

1stWhat kinds of things need to be let go?  Anger comes to mind; so does revenge, resentment, an unforgiving spirit, and the like. Too often do we carry our past with us to our detriment; it eats away at our souls and defiles our flesh. FEARS must also be let go.

2nd What are healthy ways to let go? Processing externally with a professional counselor is probably best; or, just a good drinking buddy. Tea or Single Malt Scotch; what’s the difference! Writing a list of things you NEED to let go of is also a good idea. Make two copies— the 2nd one for your tea buddy or counselor. Accountability always produces more results than self-monitored goals. Commitment to put an end to ruminating over past hurts is a must. Prayer is a given; you need God’s help to make this work.

3rdWhat dare not be let go? Personal, moral character! Commitments. Personal integrity. The ability to love others when there is very little left of yourself. An ability to be vulnerable. A desire to live sacrificially. The need to be responsible with your own life and for those in your care. The gift of play. Your own ability, and need, to forgive others. And the strength to love those who have hurt you.

These are just a few of the many ways you need to let go; not of yourself, but of those things that detract from who you are as a person, as a creation of God, and as someone who has much to contribute to the world around you. So, get started, get moving! No one can do this but you.

Cold never bothered me anyway.

For what it’s worth,

  Gary

Beyond being in control

Gary, Davis, Control, Needinc, Clueless, Christians, Let it go, letting goStaying in control is probably the #1 value of most people in Western Society. Being out of control is scary; it is always lurking just below the surface of our consciousness. Personal security, personal independence, and personal significance are our TOP priorities (after food and shelter.) We have this innate fear of being out-of-control.

Some people take it too far; becoming micro-managers at work and a home. They must be hands-on and on-top of everything. If this attitude becomes embedded in a person’s psyche it creates issues of trust and insecurity. Even close friends do not want to be around them. Sometimes, it causes people to hide their true selves from those outside and to cocoon within a private world of fantasy or fear. This is not good for the soul.

However, there is another path to be taken for those who draw their strength and define their identity from somewhere beyond this present realm. It is for those who have decided that being in-control isn’t as safe and secure as they once thought. It is for those who are tired of working so feverishly to have power over everything around them. It is for those who are ready to let go.

Moving beyond being in control is frightening and terrifying. It means that you are consciously removing yourself from the button, the control switch, from being the central figure around whom all others must revolve. You must become such a person who will put your faith, your trust, in others, and, quite frankly, in God.

Why is it that we rise to our point of success in life, only to find a ceiling of doubt and emptiness at the top? The reason is that we were not meant to climb this ladder in isolation, as individuals; we were designed to do it in relationships: first, in relationships with those around us, and second, in relationship with the God who made us. This is not rocket-surgery; it is an obvious observance.

We must move beyond being in control to trust, to delegation, both of responsibility and authority, and to letting go. [Listen— Paul Cardall. Letting Go. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUONnfHb7a8 ]. It is in letting go of control that we lose our tightness, our fears, our need for dominance, and put on the cloak of grace.

If you truly want to lead, then you must move beyond being in control and learn to let go.

 

For what it’s worth,

  Gary