male pregnancy

ImageWomen are amazing creatures! They run households (40 hrs. a week), DO lift heavy things, manage finances, prepare meals ‘round the clock, work at meaningful jobs (40 hrs. a week), carry children in their bellies for an eternity (or 9 months), and then raise them after they are born (24/7, 365 days a year, 18-35 years).

Then there are men. We work at meaningful jobs (50-60 hrs. a week), providing safety for our families; we lift heavy things (producing hernias), spend money serendipitously (We have a budget?), rarely prepare meals (unless you are our son Josh, who is a chef), we would NEVER carry a child in our gut, and need to spend more time raising them once they’re born (ask any mother). Did I mention diapers… ?

But what if…?

Consider the adversities a man would face if any of us (God forbid) were pregnant.

  1. We could not play golf because we wouldn’t be able to see the ball.
  2. We would have to give up coffee due to morning sickness.
  3. Our voices would change pitch because of hormonal changes.
  4. We would have to cut down on beer to make room for the baby.
  5. Sliding in and out of cars would become a chore. O, never mind; it already is.
  6. Getting comfortable in bed would become a distant memory.
  7. So would sleep.
  8. Back pain would quadruple.
  9. No aspirin; no Alka-Seltzer; no laxatives—even though you feel like you are the model caricature for constipation.
  10. Then, there are the joys of giving birth. Not going there, guys!

Every life-form on this planet has a place in the grand scheme of things; humans especially. (With mosquitoes, I take issue). To be sure, there are exceptions and deformations (The Elephant Man, Joseph Merrick 1862-1890, is an extreme example).  This realm is a vast, complex eco-system and that the God of the universe has arranged to work in a symbiotic relationship for the common good. Thanks to modern technologies we are daily discovering more of our life’s intricacies as we journey on.

Please, don’t try to mess up what God has designed. Especially if there is a danger of me getting pregnant!

So, Kudos to God our Creator; and to every woman everywhere, thank you,

Gary

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