Tag: Dr

triggers

Dr, Gary, Davis, Needinc, Clueless, Christianity, Christian, triggers, behavior, revenge, What sets you off? You know…, those little experiences or events that make something inside you go POP! Psychologically, these are called triggers— a stimulus that evokes a response pattern. Triggers have been used intentionally to activate sleeper spies, to provoke an argument as a deflection from the main point, or to tantalize a young lady through a simple touch. Unintentionally, we respond to buzz words (Jesus, @#$%, whatever, thank-you, nigger, jerk, etc), déjà vu situations, anger, aromas, and sounds that draw up recollections pleasant, or not so pleasant, from our past. Triggers set us off. They ignite something within us that changes our behavior for good or ill.

Some personalities explode upon the stimulus of a trigger. Other personality types (most notably, Brits) respond with a greater degree of civility, at least externally. Neither is more/less mature that the other: they are merely factors of personality and cultural propriety. The more “restrained” person merely has learned to put a lid on it, though seething animosity continues to ferment within.

Beliefs are quite another matter. They are the guiding principles by which we manage our lives and perceive the world around us. They tend to be systematic morés, firmly ensconced at the foundation or our being: they are, for the most part, consistent, cohesive, and compelling of the way we live. Here, too, triggers can have an effect. Some external experiences can rekindle our beliefs to become more fervent and play a more dominant role in our lives, like a blatant injustice, or a natural catastrophe, or genuine remorse for real guilt. Other triggers, like an insatiable lust, or desire for revenge, can demolish the connection we have with our beliefs in an instant. Though the beliefs may still be intact, they now offer little comfort or compass to regain our bearings. Triggers, clearly, can have a positive or negative effect on any of us.

But the questions I want you to grapple with through this emPulse are these—

  • What are your triggers? What sets you off? Positively? or Negatively?
  • What does it take for you to get so mad that you will finally DO something and make a difference?
  • If Jesus railed at the market-vendors He found in the Temple and drove them out with a whip, but sat still as a prostitute cleaned His feet with costly perfume, why do you believe you must always respond with the same demeanor to all situations?

Now, if you are content to live a simple, unruffled, composed, calculated, cautious, and calm life, just ignore all of the above. You have other issues to deal with.

Have a nice week.

Gary

weapons of self-destruction

Dr, Gary, Davis, Needinc, Clueless, Christianity, Christian, We’ve all met someone who seems to have a built-in self-destruct button. They make consistently bad decisions; some of them life threatening. We worry about these people; we try to help them; and, sometimes, we stay as far away from them as possible. Their personal annihilation often drains the life out of those around them.

Much more delicately, however, each of us fabricate our own weapons of self-destruction. Not intentionally, of course, but we do it nonetheless. Here are a few WSDs I’ve observed in people.

·  Over-commitment · Short-changing on sleep · Peopled-out
·  No time alone, down-time · Work is life: life is work · No time for even one friend
· Afraid to adapt, change, grow · Constant headaches · Loss of life’s excitement

There are more WSDs, to be sure. But these are the most obvious to others; if we’re honest, we’ve all sensed some of these signs in ourselves at one time or another. The question is what we DO about them. Here’s my next list for defusing some of these devices and lessening the extent of damage they can do in our lives.

1.       Take stock of your life. Not just a cursory band-aid review, but a full-fledged assessment of who you are and what you are doing. You may want a sounding-board person to help you establish an honest perspective on yourself.

2.       GO TO BED! Sorry, you DO need 8 hours. Talk with your doctor about a sleep-aid if necessary.

3.       For a time, limit the people in your life to a balance of feeders and drainers. i.e.- you need to be fed as you give out.

4.       Get away. Go for a walk (daily, alone), go to a hotel (no TV), get out in the woods…, something.

5.       Create a life that is separate from work. Anything. Take up knitting! Snow-football. Watch-making. Anything.

6.       You have to have at least one friend with whom you are completely safe. Find ‘em, feed ‘em, laugh with them.

7.       Start by brushing your teeth differently, then shift from boxers to briefs & vice-versa. Try doing something completely unusual for you. Hug people you’ve never hugged before. Smile at your enemies; send them gifts. Anything!

8.       Headaches are our body’s cues that we are pushing too much. [Some people can push more than others.] Go to a medical doctor and get some perspective…, and some proper medication.

9.       If nothing in life excites you any longer you are in the grasp of some form of depression. You need to talk to a professional counselor, psychologist, etc. more than anything the loss of a zest for life will destroy you. DO NOT let this WSD run its course.

Remember, it is never too late to regain your equilibrium in life. Our Creator did not make us to fall apart; that’s our doing. Let Him help rebuild your life into something remarkable, full of life, and maybe a little outrageous!

Have a nice week.

Gary

insightinfusionimplications

Dr, Gary, Davis, Needinc, Clueless, Christianity, Christian, insight, ideas, Edison, It’s in those frantic, life-is-too-full periods of life that flashes of insight come to us more frequently. Granted, having an incredible insight while sitting on a beach as tropical breezes blow over you is the preferred way of receiving an insight, it is more likely that they will hit you when you are too involved to take note of them. So much has been lost to human innovation due to a loss of a momentary insight that might have cured the common cold, rid the world of political positioning, or developed a galactic hyper drive. Carrying pen & paper (PDA, SmartPhone, voice-recorder, etc.) with you just might save the world.

Insights are wonderful things; they spark the imagination, solve problems, create new realities, gadgets & industries. They move the human race one step further away from the cave. Some people seem to have more insights than others:  they are people who are always imagining— imagining different ways of doing the same things. The wheel comes to mind, as does language, the alphabet, the printing press, the assembly-line, the computer, the internet, and deciphering the dynamics of cross cultural communications.

There are serious implications for people who receive an infusion of insights. [Not for those who came up with the Slinky, the Barbie Doll, or the trashcan for chewing gum.] For theirs is the responsibility to invent and utilize their day-dreamed devices in ways that benefit society, & the world’s peoples. But how does one go about the responsibility of bringing their insights to invention and usefulness? Here are some ideas—

  1. Surround yourself with other insightful people. You probably do this anyway, but if you don’t , well… . Working alone will never carry your idea to fruition.
  2. Find practical people who know how to make things work!  For example—  clever assistants (like mine…, and no, you can’t have her), lawyers, financiers to back the development of your idea, marketers , and patent officers that will protect your idea.
  3. Get used to rejection and failure. What was it Thomas Edison said about the light bulb? He hadn’t failed 10,000 times; he just learned 10,000 ways how not to make a light bulb. You know Post-it Notes, Velcro, the Hamburger—they all took decades to catch on. So be willing to admit it when you don’t quite get it right. Now try it again.
  4. Learn patience.
  5. Believe in what you are doing. Find people who believe in you and in your idea.
  6. Don’t let it consume you. Remember to breathe, spend time with family & friends. (I find that creating 2-3 new ideas at the same time provides me with more balance & reality checks than working on one all consuming idea.)

Remember what Jesus said, “For to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.” (Luke 12:48)  Create wisely, with gusto; enjoy yourself while you’re at it.

Have a nice week.

Gary

Fertilizer

Dr, Gary, Davis, Clueless, Christianity, NEEDinc, Fertilizer

I grew up a city kid. The Baltimore harbor-front was my turf. I was in a teenage gang; but we all were in those days; that’s just the way it was. Through my father’s business acquaintances I found a friendship in my total opposite—a farm boy, Asa Sharp. When our families would visit their farm in rural Maryland, Asa and I would always escape to the barn where we would build tunnels & forts through the hay bales. It was a miracle we weren’t killed by their collapsing on top of us.

From below the hay-loft, where the cows were milked, there arose such an awful stench! From the other end of the cow. The cows were making fertilizer…, at no extra cost to the farmer. The smell was so horrible I asked Asa how he ever stood it! He replied “What smell?” (I much preferred the aroma of oil slicks & refuse floating in the Baltimore harbor. The scent of home!)

This past week I received probably the oddest compliment of my life. A well known individual, commenting on a lecture I had just delivered, Growing a postChristian Faith, remarked that I was fertilizer! Now, not a few people have oft noted that they thought I was full of it (it being, well, you know). But this comment went way beyond that; I was no longer merely full-of-it, I WAS IT!

This gentleman went on to remind me that the purpose of fertilizer is to add nutrients to the soil so the seeds can grow. Fertilizer nurtured the seed planted to make both the ground and the young plant more vibrant and full of life. Truly, when I understood, it was probably one of the highest compliments I had ever been paid.

That led me to wonder how many of us are fertilizer to our friends, family, and work associates— nurturing them, feeding their growth, and providing an environment for their healthy journey to maturity? Fertilizing the soil, to receive the seed takes a lot more work. First you need the cows; then you need to feed them; then you need to clean up after them when they make a mew of things; then you need to let their mess sit around a bit, ‘till it settles (sound familiar?); finally, you need to spread their manure all over a freshly tilled field. THEN, you get to plant the seed. Then, you wait for God to work His miracles. It’s just so more natural to yell and scream, to confront and condemn, to cast blame and to judge…, and to simply dump @#$& on people, isn’t it!?! Right, that will produce positive results.

Have a nice week.

Gary